So, Lubbock had to be told that "there's no swimming in playa lakes"? Apparently, someone needed this information.

The city's playa lakes are the repository for the worlds most rudimentary drainage system. They are Lubbock's answers to handling stormwater. Basically, all the water is supposed to run down the roads (because water reads instructions), and all the oil, dead animals, homeless poo and everything else ends up in those lakes, too.

You know how in the movie IT there's a clown living in a somewhat modern drainage system? Well, our clowns live in the lakes by the side of the road.

That water is nasty. It's not fit to drink, cool off in, or even wash your butt in an emergency situation. I think the term for our Spanish speaking friends is: Aqua No Bueno.

Believe it or not, there used to be people who actually windsurfed these lakes. I don't see people do this anymore, probably because those people all grew parasitic twins and now make their money as special attractions at circuses.

Seriously -- don't get in the water.