No Joke: Orlando’s and Caprock Cafe Are Selling Toilet Paper

I usually don't spend much time on social media on the first day of April simply because it can become awfully annoying. All of the fake engagements to someone's favorite beer; the ever so unique lottery winning announcement; and the super insensitive sonogram 'We're Pregnant, but not really' posts get really old, really fast.

Today was different, since I'm practicing social distancing and staying home. I scrolled with wild abandon -- laughing, crying and groaning at all of the various creative ways in which people enjoy the day designated for pranks.

As I scrolled, I stumbled across this post on Facebook by my good friends at Orlando's restaurants:

The post about Orlando's offering rolls of toilet paper caught my attention, especially the bit about "We've got your ass covered!" But was it an April Fools' Day joke? My mind quickly went into investigator mode as I grabbed my phone to contact the restaurant owners, praying that this was not some silly prank.

Orlando's wants to make sure you're taken care of, whether it's going into your body or coming out...

While I and many others believed it to be an April Fools Day joke, it turns out that the restaurant is not only offering toilet paper rolls for sale, but all four of the locally owned, home-grown and operated eateries are making this deal available.

That means there is likely an Orlando's or Caprock Cafe near your neighborhood ready to rock and TP roll ya for $1.50 per roll. For now, there's no limit to the number of rolls per order.

I let my inner hoarder out and ordered a dozen just to see if I could, and I can, and I did! So everyone in the house is fed and full of warm yummy Orlando's supper, and we even ordered dessert to escape the reality of the day and enjoy what we consider a luxury.

Food service providers are sitting on mountains of toilet paper since schools and non-essential businesses have been closed, and our local restaurants have access to those stockpiles of goods.

Now more than ever is a great time to shop and eat local with the stock of perishable and non-perishable goods sitting in warehouses that are only supplied to account holders who buy in bulk. That's why Orlando's and Caprock Cafe are also offering 10-pound chubs of 81/19 ground beef for $35.

Don't forget they have alcohol, too!

I need to say thanks to the perfectly pleasant young lady answering the phones and taking orders, though I'm sorry I didn't catch her name. And to Will for delivering our supper and butt paper and being a super cool cat for letting my man-friend and I treat him like a rockstar, including taking his photo and stopping short of asking for his autograph.

But most of all, I really want to show some love to Loyd Turner and David Cea for always being so responsive to the needs of our community. They truly are leaders of men, and I hope the current crisis will pass sooner rather than later for the sake of businesses such as theirs.