The Most Lubbock Way To Waste An Entire Saturday

Every Saturday in the bustling metropolis of Lubbock starts with the same two lies:

"I'm just going to run a quick errand. I'll be back in 20 minutes."

That's all. Just one stop. A quick in and out. You'll be back in front of the television in no time! You might even get some productive stuff done around the house with all the extra time you'll have, right?

Then Lubbock says, "Nope."

It's got other plans.

It all starts with gas...

Then, since you're already at the store, you might as well run in for a few gummies and a drink. While inside, you spot a friend you haven't seen in a while. You'll be chatting it up with them for a few minutes (no biggie) and then back on track to head home and get into that Netflix docuseries about that crazy lady who stole the other lady's baby. Saturday is still on track.

But, now, you're hungry...

You weren't hungry 5 minutes ago, but on the way home, you passed nearly every single one of your favorite restaurants. You can smell the tortillas with your windows still rolled up when you pass the last one, and it's enough to make you turn around and go back. You can't help it. Fresh tortillas...

You're finished with lunch, and you suddenly remember there was an actual important errand you were supposed to run after filling up your tank. Crap.

By mid-afternoon, you've driven back and forth across town so many times that your GPS is asking if it should alert the authorities.

Somewhere along the line, you'll bump into 20 other people you know that will get you off course. That's the curse of Lubbock. Everyone knows you, and everyone wants to chat with you when they spot you out and about.

Eventually...

You'll make it home with 6 shopping bags, none of which contain anything that you actually set out to buy that day. Your wallet is also noticeably lighter.

Oh, and the original errand you were going to run? Remember that one?

Never happened.

Better luck next Saturday!

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